It’s finally arrived, a reality television show about – wait for it – storage units! Believe it or not, Auction Hunters premiered November 9 on Spike TV. The premise is probably exactly what you thought it would be. A couple of mismatched fellows spend their days digging through abandoned or seized storage units in search of valuable items. Allen is the taller one in a Polo shirt who could pass for Dana Carvey if you weren’t looking too closely. Ton is the rather large fellow sporting a shaven, tattooed scalp, obligatory goatee, and who looks like a refugee from the Road Warrior.
So what are these two losers going to teach us about valuable stuff found in storage units? Well, it turns out they actually have pedigree, sort of, for discerning what might be worth something and what isn’t. Allen is a second generation antique dealer with 20 years experience as a collector. He bought and sold his way through college and was one of the first vintage dealers to realize the extraordinary potential for profit offered by eBay. Auction Hunters isn’t his first foray into television. You might have seen him previously as the Yard Sale Guy on the Style Network’s Clean House, or HGTV’s My House is Worth What?
At 6’0” and 300 lbs, Ton makes an impression everywhere he goes. Maybe lacking a bit in the professional experience department, this self-described hobbyist has spent years collecting knives, swords, guns, old currency, and jewelry. A renowned Southern California auction hunter, Ton has carved a niche for himself as a quick turnaround artist for many of the pieces he finds: coins, guns, swords, and collectible baseball cards. In his spare time, Ton wrangles bobcats, mountain lions, and venomous snakes under the auspices of his Reptile Rescue and Wildlife Services business.
Though we haven’t seen anything but the trailer, it’s a good bet there will be plenty of guns and money discovered. Who ever knew the self storage business could be so much fun? The lesson to take away from this is that there is absolutely no human occupation under the sun too obscure for a cable television channel to turn into a reality series. Bounty hunters, animal control specialists, and now self storage unit pilferers.
Make sure to tune in and enjoy what’s left of this mini-run show. Or don’t. To be perfectly honest, Ton kind of scares us.
The MHP Listings Team
Flickr / HowardLake